Every week I teach approximately 160 kids. They say some ridiculous things. I write them down as accurately and timely as possible, on tiny scraps of paper, then on Fridays I compile the best lines into these weekly Friday Field Notes.
Enjoy. I certainly do.
Grade 1 or 2
Whenever I wear my glasses, the kids have to spend the first 5 minutes of music class talking about them. Due to a horrendous bout of pink eye, I had been wearing my glasses for a few weeks. When I switched back to contacts, the kids felt the need to discuss it.
E: Why aren’t you wearing glasses?
Me: I have contacts in.
O: Contexts?Me: ConTACTS.
E: Do you like to text?
All of the kids: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
E (loud whisper): O said the S – E – X!
All of the kids: GASP!
M: This is a joke. I went to the doctor and said can I have a replaced butt please mine has a crack.
All of the kids: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
Turned on the CD player, and the radio is blasting.
Me: Wow! Miss H must listen to the radio when you guys aren’t here.
B: YEAH NO SHE DOES NOT.
Me: Maybe she does when you’re not here.
B: Maybe her BFF comes and they dance.
C: Her DSS?
B: NO. Her BFF. BEST FRIEND FRIEND.
Me: Does anyone have any questions about the song?
M: I lost a tooth.
J: One time I saw someone at Fair Havens (?) with ONE tooth.
Me: I’m going to put on a song that uses the electric guitar.
B: OHHHHHH it’s going to get PUMPED UP!!!!!
The kids in my afternoon class are big into walking up to me, telling me something, and abruptly walking away. All of the following were delivered in this manner.
C (whispering): You’re a 3D shape.
J: Even though there are people named J, we are all different people. Except for twins.
C: Sometimes when Kung Fu kids get their candy stolen, they fight back.
J: I don’t like coconut.
During a quiet work period, one of the kids was talking.
M: SHHHH. You’re making me lose my subtraction!
Overheard during music class.
Y (LOUD, and many many times): There’s a cross on our drum. Jesus must have died on ours.
Me: So what did you guys do at the winter carnival?
They all shared what they did, some shared that they lost the games.
J: It doesn’t even matter if you lost all of the activities like me because I was having fun, even. It was important just that I had fun.
Me: I really appreciate J’s positive attitude. I think J could have fun no matter what he did. He always has a smile on his face.
D: Even with homework?
Me: J, do you think homework is fun?
J: (nods) well I don’t even care too much because that’s just what you have to do and things you have to do are fun. And that’s the important stuff. So I just do things like that and stuff because the fun part is having fun.
The fun part is having fun. Right?