Facial Hair 101

>I like dudes with facial hair.

This is no secret. There is something ultra rugged and manly about facial hair that I can’t quite explain. It can be a supremely attractive feature. If done right, facial hair can make a fantastic impression. It can also have the complete opposite effect. Now I am no expert (being a lady and all) but I’d like to think I’m somewhat of an expert (being a lady and all). I’m here to share with you my facial hair wisdom.

This is Facial Hair 101. Read. Learn. Grow. Shave.

First up: The Mustache
A mustache is an interesting beast. As of late, it has become quite the controversy. In the 80s and 90s, everyone’s dad seems to have one and there wasn’t anything funny about it. Remember Hal Johnson?

He had a mustache. No one thought anything of it. I’m sure Joanne McLeod even liked it. It was normal.

Now all of a sudden, mustaches are gross. Dudes grow mustaches to be funny in a “look how disgusting I am ha ha!” sort of way. There is an entire month devoted to mustaches and looking gross. Also cancer, but that’s beside the point. People tattoo mustaches to their fingers so they can take cheeky pictures and post them online. People buy things with mustaches on them (guilty!). They even made a movie based on a man. With a mustache.

So why are they gross? Or are they acceptable? Are they trendy? I still haven’t figured this out. I think they’re trendy. Yes, most definitely trendy. In a “ha ha mustaches are so not trendy that they’re trendy” sort of way.

All I know is this: the only way you can be taken seriously with a mustache on your face is if you are a father and/or over 40. Or if you are Tom Selleck.

Facial hair question: What is the magic age a mustache becomes an acceptable and appropriate form of facial hair?