Someone told me that the ads that appear on the right side of your Facebook page are reflective of what you do on the internet. Here’s a list of ads that have appeared within the last couple of days and what they say about me.
Today’s Hot Deals! Well I DO love a good deal. When I walk into a store, I go straight to the sale rack. I rarely buy anything regular price (unless the regular price is $10 and under, then I’m all over it)
Mastercard. I’m a VISA girl, but I guess this one is pretty straightforward.
21st Century Church. Hey! I go to church! I live in the 21st Century! Good job, Facebook!
Ravioli Soup with Havarti. While this sounds delicious, I have pretty significant food intolerances. This would kill me slowly. But it’s the thought that counts, right?
EpiPen. I know I just said that I have food intolerances, but that doesn’t mean I need an EpiPen. I can take care of myself. That’s almost a little insulting.
Great RUGBY training ! (with a space before the exclamation mark). Well I do like exercise in some situations, but I don’t know if Rugby is really a fit for someone my size, or for someone who despises running as much as I do. I’ll pass, thanks.
Roca Labs Gastric Bypass. So what exactly are you trying to say, here? Do you think I need surgery? It’s only allergies! Bypass wouldn’t fix me. Unless…you are hinting at something else? First exercise and now surgery? DO YOU THINK I’M FAT, FACEBOOK?
Charter Fishing. Fishing? You think I’m too obese for regular exercise, and all I can do is FISH? That’s hardly a sport. Most of it involves sitting! So you think I should just spend the rest of my leisure time doing nothing but sitting? AM I REALLY THAT LAZY IN YOUR EYES?
Join the Cattitude. Cats?! CATS?! I’M NOT THAT FAR GONE, YET!
Buy cheese online! Hey! You can buy cheese online? That’s so convenient. I could just sit here and with a few clicks of a button, have cheese delivered to my house. I wouldn’t have to walk through the grocery store or get off the couch even. I could just sit here with my cats and….I HATE YOU, FACEBOOK.